The end of the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It has been a long tradition in Berlin that the 1st of May celebration in the borough of Kreuzberg

-specifically the area between Moritzplatz and Kottbusertor- gets really crazy rather violent, with casualties and some times even a couple of deaths. Due to the increasing presence of the extreme right groups in some areas around the city that also organise marches in the city on the 1st of May, the situation has developed quite unpleasent in areas like Kreuzberg, Friedrichshain and some streets of Prenzlauerberg. But the heart of the barricades has always been the "Moritz-Kotty belt" along the Oranienstrasse or little Istanbul.

Extreme right groups and left oriented groups crash every year with increasing violence, not to mention the ones that only want to enjoy raising hell around the city during that date taking advantage of the confusion. All this mess is what the berliner proudly call "die Krawallen" and they consider them the "quintessence" of the city. I really don't agree with the whole thing but I don't want to begin a debate about the real sense of the 1st of May quite more serious and meaningfull than die Krawallen, I simply can't see what the old '68 berliner left finds so great about destroying every 12 months a whole area of the city just for the fun of it causing damages not to the capitalist or the facist -as they pretend- but to the small people who live and work in the Oraninestrasse and every year lose a bunch of money reparing their little stores and coffee shops to maintain their families.

Any way that's not my issue in this blog. The thing is that exactly on this 1st of May I will be in the Oraninestrasse Nr. 162 in the "Max und Moritz" beer house celebrating my friend's 50th birthday, only a few meters away from Moritzplatz direction to Kottbusertor. I only have 48 hours before the end of the world!

It seems pretty stupid to celebrate a birthday party on the 1st of May in the Oranienstrasse but fact is that there was no alternative since Leopold (the birthday's boy) was born exactly on the 1st of May, it was not possible to celebrate one day earlier or later, or one week earlier or later, because most of the guests are coming from Austria (why Leopold is austrian!) they have the 1st of May free and they have to drive back home no later than Sunnday the 2nd of May.

But let's try to keep some optimism and say that I will manage to shaw Leopold his birthday's present before we all pass away in the middle of the Krawallen this very Saturday. The present is a short video with an animation about his life (not a biography or something like that). I hope he will enjoy it and, who knows, may be you enjoy it too if you click the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ww9n76iFNY

I must warn you that if you are living in Germany you won't be able to see it because it is banned due to some copy rights stuff, but if you are aborad probably you will see it. And if you don't hear any more about me...you know where I have spent the last minutes of my life...

The definition of tired

Do you know the definition of "tired"? Or let's put it in this way: do you know my definition of "tired"? Well here it comes: tired is the physical and psychical condition you get in when you realise that your stupid life has reached the point of no return and from there on everything will get only worse and all chances to get a little bit better are definitely and absolutely excluded.

When you get into such a condition you are aware that everything you've done in the past was useless and that everything you do for the future will be exactly so uselss, your whole life was and will be a waste of energy.

The ballance of risks and chances didn't really work in an optimal way, and the constellation of oportunities and decisions was not the ideal one, or let's say the fair one. When you're going through a mobbing situation you are not fit to take the most reasonable decisions, exactly as when you drive on an awful narrow road and you take the wrong exit in your anxiety to find a wider road but the engineers had messed up the construction and it happens to be a going-no-where exit; of course you want to reverse but, baby dearest, since it is a very messy road you are now sinking in the mud, so you only

have two options: stay for ever in the car or take out your shoes and keep going on the stinking mud knowing you are walking all along the aimless road!

I'm sure you are saying yourself right now "What the hell! All this shit is nothing more than a self pity weepy-fag exageration, pfuagh!!" well sorry tough macho /domina guys, maybe it is a blody exageration but anyway believe me when you are in this mood there is no way to see things in any objective manner. Or do you happen to be immune to weakness? HA!

But as cheerfull as I always try to be I will not finish this post without pointing out at least one positive fact and it is that I'm really happy to find out that there is a SECOND FOLLOWER reading my blog!!! My fans are multiplying!! I love you Despina, whoever you are, big hugs!

Aren't these really good news in the middle of the slum? Even in the hell shines the sun from time to time :-))))))))

Dedicated to Paul, my faithful reader

Hi Paul my dear! I was absent for a long time I know, please forgive me. The begining of 2010 has been everything but joyful for me: lots of personal and professional problems (they always come together, I guess they are twins). Anyway things begin to see clearer out but still no reason to be over-optimist, let's say that the fire in hell is at middle low grade and not any more at full flame, that's an advantage isn't it? Even though I was not writing my blog I have been thinking the whole time of it and its main issue: the way my life has really developed and the way I actually wanted to develop it...mate I can only tell you: night and day or rather water and oil.

But hey, lets make no "wall of lamentations" out of this blog and rather focus on the chances and the many not-so-bad-things that sorround me. You know what they say: "Get a life or fuck off!"